Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Bath Guy


Date #1
Place: An Italian Restaurant somewhere in Connecticut

     I wore a pair of jeans that my friends claim makes my butt look small and perky.  The lavender blouse I finally selected fell loosely off my right shoulder and exposed my tan line.  I pulled my long dark hair back into a lazy pony tail but made sure a few strands gracefully touched my sun kissed cheeks.  I loaded on the mascara for a dramatic look and carefully applied the perfect amount of gloss onto my lips.  I felt pretty, confident and ready for tonight’s date!

     I met this guy while my friends and I waited for a table in a busy restaurant on a Connecticut beach.  The bar area was crowded but we found a spot to stand.  I didn’t look too bad considering the fact that I spent the last three hours smearing sun block all over my sunburned body.  He must have overheard me complaining to my friends because his pick up line was really smooth.

            “You know.  Sunblock usually works best when you apply it before you go into the sun.”  He said
            “Hum.  Is that how it works?”  I asked sarcastically
            “Yup.  It says so on the bottle.”  He said with a sly smile.

     We continued to exchange friendly banter until our table was ready.  I thanked him for the entertainment and walked away with my friends.  A few minutes after the girls and I settled into our seats, the waitress brought over a bottle of wine.  She pointed over to they guy I was talking to at the bar and he raised his glass to me.  I smiled and waved thinking that was a sufficient thank you.  My friends disagreed.
           
            “Pick up your lazy, sunburned ass and walk over to him.  He deserves a better thank you than that!”  Lisa scolded.

     She was right; I needed to thank him properly.  I carefully pealed myself off my plastic chair and walked over to him.
           
            “Thank you.  You really didn’t have to do that.”  I said
            “I know I didn’t have to.  I wanted to.”  He said.
            “Well, thank you from all of us.”  I said with a flirty smile.
            “What’s your name?”  He asked.
            “Emanuela.  And you are?”  I asked
            “Preston.  It’s nice to meet you Emanuela.”  He said then extended his right hand.
            “The pleasure was all mine.  Well, actually, the pleasure was all of ours!  Thanks again for the wine.”  I said and turned away to walk back to my table.
            “Wait a minute.  Can I get your number?”  He asked as he grabbed my hand.
               
    I got chills!  Hell yeah he could have my number! I made sure I spoke slowly and pronounced each number clearly as he entered it into his phone.  I said a little prayer as I walked back to my table.  I really wanted this guy to call me and he did, the very next day!  We made plans to meet for dinner a few nights later and tonight is the night!

“You look beautiful.” Preston said before taking sip from his wine glass.
  “Thank you.”  I replied bashfully.

      This guy was HOT!  His thick blond hair complimented his gorgeous face and his hands were so masculine.  I wanted to crawl across the table and rip off his button down shirt with my teeth but a voice in my head begged me not to do it.  I listened.  Instead, I sat back and asked him a few questions just so I could hear his angelic voice.  I found out that he was an investor and that he loved to travel.  He asked me a few questions and he seemed pleased with my responses. 

     The food was delicious, the wine was fantastic and our conversation was stimulating.  I never thought I would ever be this head over heals about a guy but I was!  He asked if I wanted to get one more drink at the bar after he paid for dinner.  I really wanted to but I know what I’m capable of with a few drinks in me and I didn’t want to ruin this. I politely declined and thanked him for dinner. 

 Date #2
Place: Movie Theater

     It was a Sunday afternoon so I didn’t want to get too dressed up but I couldn’t help myself.  I wore an adorable spaghetti strap dress and a new pair of shoes.  We met in the parking lot and I could tell by the look on his face that I looked great.
           
            “Aren’t you going to be cold in the theater?”  Preston asked which wasn’t what I expected to hear.
            “I don’t think so.”  I said.
           
     He smiled, took my hand and we walked to his car.  He opened the trunk of his black Lexus and handed me a hoodie sweatshirt.
            “What’s this for?”  I asked
            “You’re going to be cold.”  He said as we walked into the theater. 
            “No I’m not.”  I said.

     He paid for our tickets, bought some candy and carefully chose seats away from a draft. We talked non-stop before the movie and I ignored the iced cold air that I felt on my head.  Preston didn’t say a word.  He simply brushed my hair away from my eyes when the wind from the air conditioner whipped it in my face.

            “Put on the sweat shirt.”  He suggested.
            “I’m fine.”  I said
            “I could see your goose bumps and your teeth are chattering.  Put on the sweat shirt.”  He said again.

     There was no point in denying it, I was cold and he knew it.  He helped me put on his clean smelling sweatshirt and I was grateful that he lent it to me.

     He walked me to my car when the movie ended and I took off his sweatshirt.  He refused to take it back and asked me to bring it on our next date.  We made plans to meet up for lunch on Tuesday

Date: #3
Place: An adorable deli

     We talked about our day.  We discussed the movie we saw and made plans to meet for drinks a later in the week.  Things were going in the right direction so fast and I didn’t have time to question any of it.  To be honest, I didn’t want to.  This guy was the textbook definition of perfection and it looked like he was going to be all mine!

Date #4
Place: Wine Bar

     We talked wine, food and exchanged vacation stories.  He has been everywhere!  I watched his beautiful brown eyes as he described the Italian vineyards he visited.  Every word that left his firm lips made me melt. 

            “Let’s do something next week.”  Preston suggested at the end of the night.
            “I wish I could.  I’ll be away for work.”  I said.
            “Ok.  We’ll do something when you get back.”  He said.
    
     He sent me texts during the day and called me at night while I was away.  He asked how my meeting was going and I asked about his day.  It was all so normal and it I liked it, a lot!

Date: #5
Place: Mexican Restaurant

            “Do you like tequila?”  Preston asked,
            “I do but I like it better on the Weekends.  There is nothing worse than working with a tequila hangover.”  I said

     He laughed and agreed. 
           
            “Fine. Let’s have dinner on Saturday night.”  He suggested and I was thrilled.



Date: #6
Place: A Bistro

     I got there a little earlier than he did so I waited in my car.  I was exhausted from cleaning my Condo from top to bottom.  I mopped floors, washed windows and even put nice sheets on my bed, just in case.  I liked this guy, a lot, and I wanted to make sure everything was perfect.  This was date #6 after all.

     I reapplied my lip-gloss for the last time just as he pulled into the parking stall next to mine.  I looked over at him and smiled.  He got out of his car and patiently waited for me.
           
            “Ready for an amazing dinner?”  He asked as I opened my car door.
            “I am.”  I replied

    He grabbed my arms, pulled me close to him and kissed me like no man has ever kissed me before! I knew that it was going to be a very good night!  We walked into the restaurant and the hostess sat us in a quite table in the corner.  

“What’s your favorite sexual position?” Preston asked out of the blue.
“Pardon?” I asked.
“You heard me.”  He said smiling.
“Are you serious?”  I asked
“Yes I’m serious!  What is your favorite sexual position?  Do you like to be on top?  I bet you like to be on top.”  He said then looked down at his pasta dish.

      I didn’t know what to say.  Who asks these questions at dinner?  Can’t he just wait to find out what my favorite is position later?  

            “You don’t have to answer me.  I’m sure I’ll find out soon.  I will tell you that when we do have sex, I’m going to have to give you a bath first.”  He said. 

    WOW! How presumptuous can one boy be?   What if I didn't want him to find out? And what does he mean by giving me a bath?

“You mean like a bubble bath?”  I asked.
“I guess we can use bubbles but not necessarily.  I’ll admit that it sounds weird but I can’t get into it unless I give you a bath first.”  He explained. 
“So, doing it right here on this table is out of the question?”  I asked
“We can do it anywhere as long as I can give you a bath first.”  He replied

    It took a while for me to register what he just said and then I wondered if he just insulted me?  Does he think I’m dirty?   How could he possibly think that?  Maybe I should ask him if he thought I was.  How the hell do I do that without sounding like a total idiot?  What if he said YES! Oh My GOD! I would just die if he thought I truly needed a bath!! I decided not to ask him mostly because I didn’t want to know the answer.
           
“How’s your dinner?” Preston asked.
            “It’s very good.”  I answered then went right back to wonder if this beautiful man thought I was dirty.

     Preston started to talk about something he read in the newspaper and I politely nodded my head.  Did he forget the bath thing?  Should I remind him?  Am I really stupid enough to bring that up again?  Yes I am.

“Going back to the bath thing.  Would you be ok if I showered instead of taking a bath?”  I asked.
            “Well, it’s the actual act of me giving you a bath that I need.”  He explained.
            “Oh, well that makes sense.”  I said.

    It actually didn’t make any sense at all but who am I to judge his fetish?  I started to worry about our relationship.  This definitely would have been a deal breaker if Preston wasn’t so pretty.  I looked into his brown eyes then back at his strong hands.  I decided that I was in.  I mentally prepared myself for a bath; how bad could it really be?  I asked him to describe what he wanted to do so he did. 

     He started with the temperature of the water and went into how he planned on lathering me up.  It didn’t sound bad at all.  It was like being in a hot tub except I would be the only one in the water while Preston leaned in from the outside.  I pictured Preston on his knees and scrubbing my…let’s say arms.  It all sounded wonderful until he got to my hair.
            “Wait a minute.  Say that part again.”  I said
            “I’m going to massage shampoo into your hair then rinse it off with water from the tub.”  He repeated.
            “You want to use bath water on my HAIR! That’s gross! And what about conditioner?  When were you planning on putting the conditioner on my ends?  Oh, and don’t forget the gloss.  It has to sit in my hair for at least five minutes before rinsing it out with fresh, clean water!”  I said in a panic.
     
     Preston stopped describing what he wanted to do to me as I rambled about applying the right products in my hair after the imaginary bath fiasco.   I also stressed the importance of styling my hair within fifteen minutes after washing it.  Any time after that will result in a curly mess! Oh no, I can’t do this.  My hair is very important to me!
            
                 “Are you ok?”  Preston asked.

     I looked at his gorgeous face and nodded yes.  He wasn’t smiling.  As a matter of fact, he looked confused.

            “Umm…You can relax. I’m only kidding.”  He said
            “You were?  Oh, I’m sorry.”  I said trying to salvage the night.
            “You took the hair thing a little too seriously.”   He said.
            “I did?  I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to.”  I said
            “Yeah, you totally over reacted.”  Preston said.

     I think that any woman would “over react” if the guy they liked announced that he had to wash her before they did it!  Especially if that announcement was made over a romantic dinner!

            “I’m sorry if you felt that I over reacted but you have to admit that the bath thing is a little odd.”  I said.
            “I don’t think it’s odd at all.”  He said
            “Wait a minute! Do you or do you NOT need to give me a bath?”  I asked
            “Does it really matter?”  He asked
            “Ahhh…YEAH!”  I said.
    
     He never answered me.  The check came shortly after my mini melt down and he paid for dinner.

    He lingered by my car and I wasn't sure if he wanted an invitation to come back to my place.  It didn't matter if he did because I wasn’t feeling it.  The whole bath thing, regardless if he was just kidding, was weird. I gave him a hug good night and we went our separate ways. Things fizzled out quickly after that dinner.

     My friends and I dissected all six dates as well as the bathing conversation.  We all concluded that he wasn’t kidding and that he was a freak.