“What kind of stain is this?” The girl working at the dry cleaner asked.
I didn’t know
what the hell kind of stain it was but I had to tell her something. I wracked my brain trying to come up with a
cleaver story but couldn’t come up with anything. So I cleared my throat a few times and
repeated her question. She picked up
the dress, shook it out and placed it on the counter with the stain facing
up. I thought back to the previous night
and tried to create a believable story.
It was a beautiful
summer’s day and I had an awful workweek.
I craved a perfectly chilled glass of white wine and a great
dinner. I called a few friends but they
all had plans. It was Friday night and a
bowl of cold cereal wasn’t going to cut it.
I decided that I was going out to dinner alone. Men do it all the time, why can’t women? I do
it when I travel for work, why not when I’m in my own town. That was it! I was treating myself to dinner in one of the
area’s popular restaurants.
I went home to freshen up and checked
myself out in a full-length mirror. I
looked pretty good after schlepping inhalers in and out of doctor’s offices throughout this hot summer day. I gave myself a pep
talk as I walked my dog then headed to the restaurant. The restaurant was crowed and I will admit
that I was a little intimidated. I
didn’t see an open table so I didn’t ask the hostess for one. I was perfectly ok with eating at the bar so
I just needed the happy hour crowd to finish up. I ordered
a glass of wine and waited patiently for someone to leave. It didn’t take long for one seat to become
available. As I sat in the tall chair I
thought that this would have taken forever if I had a friend with me. Two seats at the bar are a rare find at 6pm.
“Isn’t this
great? Two independent women sitting at the bar having dinner.” The woman next to me said.
“Yes it is
great!” I said.
“My name is
Karen.” She said and the pleasant small
talk began.
She was a very
nice person and so were the bartenders.
As a matter of fact, everyone in the bar was super nice! I was surprisingly
comfortable among theses people and the couple drinks my new male friends
bought me were delicious. Karen had to
leave so one of the men standing behind me took over her seat.
“I come
here for dinner all the time. You have
to try the tuna.” He said.
“That’s
what I ordered.” I replied with a smile.
It was easy to
flirt with this guy. He was cute,
intelligent and I had three glasses of wine in me. I checked his ring finger before I continued
to bat my eyes and toss my hair back. He
wasn’t wearing a wedding band but this guy was too good of a catch to be
single. I asked a couple of stupid
questions and he simply smiled.
“If you’re wondering if I’m single
the answer is yes.” He said.
I was
thrilled! So far going out to dinner
alone was working out beautifully! We
exchanged bad date stories, which turned into a little competition. I had to pull out the big guns; I told him
about fish guy. Needless to say, I won.
It was getting
late and I needed to stop at the pharmacy before going home. I excused myself and said good-bye to my new
friends.
“Hope to
see you here again next week.” My new
cute male friend said.
“I’ll be
here!” I said as I walked away.
Dinner was
amazing, the people were a lot of fun and I met a good guy! I floated out of the restaurant and promised
myself that I would do that at least once a week. The people I passed on the sidewalk smiled at
me. The kid in the parking lot booth let
me go without paying and all the traffic lights turned green as I approached them. It turned out to be a fabulous Friday night!
I sashayed into
the pharmacy and exchanged friendly banter with Ed, the pharmacist. He kept solid eye contact with me as he
spoke. He was extra friendly tonight and
was smiling from ear to ear. I thanked
him and asked what his plans were for the upcoming weekend. His eyes were locked on mine as he described
a weekend of picnics and gardening.
My dog Emma
greeted me when I opened my condo door. I scooped her up into my arms and carried her
upstairs and into my bedroom. I unzipped
my tan dress then unhooked my bra. I
felt an oily film on my hand and freaked out a little.
“What the
hell is that? Where did that come
from?” I asked Emma
She just looked
at me and yawned. I looked down and
noticed that a shiny substance covered my entire chest area. I picked up Emma to see if she peed on me
when I picked her up but she was dry. I
franticly ran into the bathroom.
Whatever this oily crap was it needed to come off and fast. I jumped into the tub and scrubbed my body
raw.
After my intense shower, I put on my
oversized Rod Stewart Tee-shirt then picked my bra off my bedroom floor.
“What the
hell is that?” I asked Emma again as I
investigated my puffy bra.
My bra was
saturated with the same oily crap that was all over my body. I looked closer and noticed that only the
left side was drenched but it was spreading to the right. I squeezed both sides of my bra and found tiny
bubbles sewed into both sides. The left
one was obviously deflated. I had no
idea that my bra was padded with oily packets.
I laughed out loud as I stepped over my tan dress. My laughter quickly subsided when I noticed a
huge oily circle on my dress.
“NO
WAY!” I yelled as I picked up dress.
The oil substance
from the popped bubble seeped through my dress.
I wondered how long I was walking around with a big stain over the left
breast area of my dress. I wondered if
anyone at the bar noticed specifically that guy I met! I retraced my entire
night to see if I could pin point the exact moment when my bra exploded. I didn’t remember hearing pop but clearly it
happened!
“NO, NO,
NO, NO, NO……” I repeated over and over again.
I put the dress back on to see how noticeable the circle of embarrassment
was. It was VERY noticeable. I was devastated! How could my perfect Friday night turn into
this nightmare?
I threw away the
bra, went to bed and drove to the cleaners in the morning.
The sweet girl at
the counter waited politely for my answer.
I had to tell her the truth.
“I have no
idea what it is. Apparently my bra
popped at some point last night so whatever stuff Victoria Secret fills their
bras with is what caused that big circle stain on my dress.” I said
“Ok then. Is Thursday after 4pm Okay?” She asked
“Yes it is.” I said and walked out of the cleaner’s with
my head hung low.
I’ve taken a
break from that restaurant but not from going out to dinner alone. It’s actually a lot of fun! Oh, if you’re wondering
about that guy I met; I never saw him again.
